4.0

I think this is both good and bad news. After much last minute work, N was able to get straight As (a 4.0) this quarter. It was a personal goal and I'm proud of him for working so hard to achieve his goal. He is very smart -- I've never doubted that. It shows how far he has come from a year and a half ago when his grades were all Fs. But I also don't want these grades to create continual pressure. It's okay if he doesn't get a 4.0 in the future. He definitely doesn't need anymore perfectionist tendencies.

Physical Fitness Merit Badge

Last night N attended a church youth group meeting and worked on his Physical Fitness Merit Badge. I talked about my concerns about the requirements for this merit badge in a previous post found here.

Our previous plan had been to keep N home and work on a modified worksheet (that I had already created). But, N's merit badge counselor checked in with me during the afternoon to let me know about the changes he had made to the requirements. The counselor had rewritten much of the worksheet to accommodate N. He had eliminated the body measuring, anything about weight loss and the emphasis on obesity as a risk for cardiovascular disease. [The Boy Scout program allows for modification of merit badges based on medical needs.] The counselor wanted to know if we had any specific instructions regarding diet. I just indicated that we emphasize eating a variety of foods and staying active. I didn't want him to talk about counting calories or regimented exercise. I also didn't want him to "ban" any foods. The counselor was willing to do as I asked. I was pleased with the changes he had made and I allowed N to go to the meeting.

It went really well. The only hang-up that N seemed to have afterwards was his risk for diabetes. We have a huge genetic diabetes history. He fixated on that for a while last night. I can't take that risk and his awareness of it away. But now isn't the time, either, for him to restrict or exercise with the prevention of diabetes in mind.

I'm thrilled that N was able to participate with his peers for this merit badge. I really appreciate the extra effort that his merit badge counselor gave to help accommodate N's needs.

Good Read

I loved this article in yesterday's Huffington Post by Laura Collins: She's Anorexic and You're a Bad Mother.

Reconsidering

Well, I'm not sure that N is going to end up doing his Eagle Project as I described two posts ago. We're trying to figure out if there is a way for him to demonstrate leadership without having to fully disclose the anorexia to his peers. Unless, we can spin things the right way, he probably won't do it. Right now the idea on the table is to involve the other scouts in fundraising only and label his project as "providing resources for pediatricians" or "pediatrician education" or something like that.

I have to admit that I'm disappointed. I'd like to attach some meaning -- and making a difference -- to this whole experience. But it's not my project, it's his and it's his life and his friends.

Time Travel

N is struggling a bit again. He's probably growing. The last five or six days of school, he's been late. His friends have stopped waiting for him, which is so sad because they really are part of the motivation some mornings. But he was making them late repeatedly. I can see why they would be frustrated. This morning was like a throw back to last year. He even was angry and lashing out.

School is almost over. Most of his teachers have already stopped requiring "regular" work and are instead working towards end-of-year-testing, which actually might be stressing him out. We continue to utilize the magic plate at all of his meals. I may need to magic-plate his snack in order to force some more calories. If we can survive the next two or three weeks, then we'll have the whole summer to address his growing caloric needs at home.