Monday, October 22, 2007


N finally earned his third day on Saturday. He argued that Friday should have been counted, but he threw a fit and argued about his food on Friday morning. I want to reinforce good days -- but help him to recognize things that are still problems. I need to determine a new reinforcement. It was surprising how much a $6 toy motivated him. Once he told me that he thought he could be "all better" if I got him a wii. What? Is that possible? Could it be that simple? If it was, I would offer it in a second.

Sunday wasn't quite as good. He really doesn't like his church clothes and spent a lot of time fixated on finding an old sweater to wear over his shirt. After church, he just wants to cook. But he never actually makes anything. He just spends hour reading over cookbooks, trying to find a recipe. I probably shouldn't let him do this. But if he would make cookies and eat them, that would be fantastic.

He let himself have some treats over the weekend. He has stopped limiting them. However, after he eats much, he still feels so guilty and "self-conscious." Many nights he'll cry because of what he did or didn't do with food that day. I've taught him some relaxation tricks (like imagining a ball rolling through all of the parts of your body, slow breathing, or envisioning Christmas morning). I usually have to remind him to do those things to help him fall asleep.

I've got to watch him. I've been serving him breakfast -- but he is so into predictable foods (where he knows the calories, I think) that I've let him serve himself for several days. However, I realized that he was going to walk about of the kitchen have only eating a 1/2 gogurt. I insisted on cheerios and an apple. He is late almost every day to school so I had to take his brother to school before he was ready. But when he came to the car, he had only eaten 1/2 cup of cheerios (and the 1/2 apple). I've always required a full cup of cheerios -- that makes me wonder if he is fudging other requirements. I'm pretty sure that he never lies to me -- but maybe he just conveniently "forgets."

I'm also wondering about bullemia. I really don't think this is a problem. My husband asked how N would even know about it. On the insurance questionaire that N helped me fill out, there was a question about throwing up. N saw it and said he didn't do that. But we didn't talk about it after. If I had known that question was there, I would have never let N see the paper. N has been locking himself into the bathrooms lately. Twice he triple-locked himself in to the master bath (toilet, bathroom, bedroom locks). Last night, my husband went to listen (N went to the bathroom right after dinner). He said it did sound like N was really going to the bathroom. I'll just have to watch him carefully. I don't want to ask about it out-right. I worry that it would just give him ideas. Maybe that's naive.

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